As children grow more they put more complexity on you. Everyone definitely wants their babies to become toddlers, but when the crawling converts into walking and then skipping consequently it starts putting many burdens into life.
From baby to toddler to teenager, this age of a child is the age of emotional, physical, and cognitive development.
As they want more independence, you as a parent want more control over their lives, this feels maddening.
That’s why today you’re here to read about “how to stop getting frustrated with child”.
Now, wait! And read your query again…
I believe we as a parent we want our children to be in control, but actually, we’re not even in our control. That’s what the problem is.
Here is a quick answer to how to stop getting frustrated with child: try to control your anger and anxiety instead of overthinking about your kids (it may sound weird to you but it’s the case).
Remember: “don’t worry, be happy!” As a parent, you need to understand that children are going to be kids, no matter what you do. You can’t expect them to behave like adults. Just let them be who they are and enjoy every moment with them.
Everybody tries to avoid anger, temper, and anxiety but it happens without any purpose. However, our job is to learn and implement the simple and effective ways that will surely help to stay calm when dealing with a child.
I know it’s hard and may take time but it’s the only way how to control anger with kids and eventually, you will become more positive towards your kids and your life will become easier because of it.
For your ease, I’ve compiled the 15 amazing tips that you can implement when getting frustrated with kids.
1. Take a deep breath
How to control your temper?
Deep breathing can be the way…
When you feel the rage coming towards you, try to take a deep breath and let it go. You have to be aware that everything is fine, and there is no reason for you to get angry.
Don’t think that this is not going to work because it will! I’ve done it many times and I can tell you that it works like a charm.
2. Distract yourself
When your anger or anxiety starts growing, try to distract yourself in any way possible. Go for a walk, listen to music or read something interesting (anything that will make you forget about your kids). This way you can calm down very quickly and there will be no reason for anger or frustration.
3. Think about the consequences
When your anger is uncontrollable, try to think about the consequences of your actions. What will happen if you yell at your kids? Will it solve anything? Will it help to get things done faster? No! It will only make things worse and you will end up regretting it.
4. Put yourself in their shoes
Try to put yourself in your children’s shoes and see how would you feel if someone was yelling at you all the time or constantly criticizing everything you do. If a child feels that he/she is being judged all the time, he/she won’t feel loved and accepted for who he/she is and this can result in negative behavior later on.
5. Use a timer
This is one of the best ways to deal with frustration.
If you are having trouble controlling your anger, try to use a timer. Set it for 10 minutes and start doing something you like (or something that needs to be done). After 10 minutes, stop whatever you’re doing and go back to your kids. You will feel that your anger has subsided a lot and you will be more relaxed and in control.
6. Take care of yourself
Make sure that you take care of yourself too! Go for a walk, eat healthy food, meditate, read books or spend time with friends. If you don’t take care of yourself, it will be very difficult to take care of anyone else!
7. Show affection
When you’re angry, try to do something that will make your kids feel loved and accepted. Give them a hug or a kiss, or just tell them how much they mean to you. Your children need to feel that they are loved and accepted no matter what they do!
8. Remember that losing control is not an option!
It’s not acceptable for parents to lose control over their emotions and behavior towards their children – no matter what the circumstances are! This can cause serious emotional damage in children and can result in feelings of fear, guilt, and shame which will stay with them into the future.
9. Don’t use punishment as a reward!
Some parents think that the best way to teach their children how to behave is through punishment. However, punishing your child for acting in a certain way will only make him/her act in this way more often! Punishment will only increase misbehavior and can lead to serious emotional damage in children.
10. Talk it out!
If you can, talk to your child about what happened and how he/she made you angry, and why you were so angry. If your child understands why you were angry, he/she may be less likely to repeat the behavior which angers you again. It’s important for kids to understand that anger is an emotion just like any other one, and that everyone has it – including parents!
12. Avoid using “you” statements!
When expressing anger to your child, avoid using “you” statements like “You are always making me angry!” or “You are such a bad boy/girl!” This will make the child feel guilty when he/she is doing nothing wrong and can cause long-term damage to his/her self-esteem.
13. Use positive self-talk
This can be a great solution to how to stop getting frustrated with child.
Start talking with yourself. Use positive self-talk in order to reduce your stress and anxiety levels. Imagine that you have a friend who is going through the same situation as you are. How would he/she talk to him or herself? Then, talk to yourself in the same manner! You may not believe it at first, but with regular practice, this will become a habit and you will notice an improvement in your mood.
14. Avoid arguing!
Argumentative people are often more stressed than those who avoid arguments. So, next time you feel angry about something your child said or did, try to avoid arguing with him/her! Arguing will only make things worse and can lead to serious emotional damage in children. Instead, if you feel that your child is doing something wrong, use positive self-talk to remind yourself that you can handle this situation. If you are still feeling angry, try to calm down before talking to your child.
15. Be kind!
Kids learn from the examples set for them by their parents and other adults in their lives. If you want your children to be kind and loving people, be kind and loving towards them! Be patient with them when they make mistakes. Give them time to calm down after a stressful situation so that they don’t lash out at someone else (or themselves). Don’t yell at them or hit them when they do something wrong. Instead, explain why what they did was not acceptable and give them alternatives on how they could have handled the situation differently.
Also, teach your children that it is okay to make mistakes as well! Everyone makes mistakes sometimes…
Before ending this guide, I highly recommend checking out this video guide by “The Parenting Junkie”.
? More On Kids’ Social Behavior Consequences:
? How to deal with a sulking kid
? How to deal with a whiny toddler
Some parents use anger as a way to show how much they love their children. However, anger is not an emotion that should be used in this way. In fact, it can have serious consequences for your child’s health and well-being. Try to avoid using anger when you are disciplining your child, and try to express your love through other means instead.
Now, if you have any questions or concerns related to your query “how to stop getting frustrated with child”, or want to share some working methods, hit the comment down.
Mo is a home-based Mommie and a passionate journalist. She loves to help other moms to spend a good life.